Ok, so perhaps I have too much time on my hands right now, but come on, philosophy is something that never gets boring! That said, step into my mind for a minute and contemplate with me. 
Why is "abbreviated" such a long word?
Why is lemon juice made with artificial flavor, and dishwashing liquid made with real lemons?
Why is the third hand on the watch called a second hand?
Why isn't there a special name for the tops of your feet?
If nothing ever sticks to TEFLON, how do they make TEFLON stick to the pan?
Can a stupid person be a smart-ass?
Can fat people go skinny-dipping?
Why is it considered necessary to nail down the lid of a coffin?
Why is it that rain drops but snow falls?
Why is the time of day with the slowest traffic called rush hour?
Why is the man who invests all your money, called a broker?
Why don't you ever see the headline "Psychic Wins Lottery"?
Why isn't there mouse flavored cat food? There is fish flavored!
Why is it that doctors call what they do "practice"?
Why is it that when you're driving and looking for an address, you turn down the volume on the radio?
Why does the sun lighten our hair, but darken our skin?
Why is it called lipstick if you can still move your lips?
Why doesn't glue stick to the inside of the bottle?
Why is it that to stop Windows, you have to click on "Start"?
If all is not lost, where is it?
If Barbie is so popular, why do you have to buy her friends?
Why do steam irons have a permanent press setting?
Why do you need a driver's license to buy liquor when you can't drink and drive?
Why are there flotation devices under plane seats instead of parachutes?
Do you need a silencer if you are going to shoot a mime?
If a cow laughed, would milk come out her nose?
If you tied buttered toast to the back of a cat and dropped it from a height, what would happen?
Why are cigarettes sold in gas stations when smoking is prohibited there?
You know how most packages say "Open here". What is the protocol if the package says, "Open somewhere else"?
You know that little indestructible black box that is used on planes, why can't they make the whole plane out of the same substance?
If a 7-11 is open 24 hours a day, 365 days a year, why are there locks on the doors?
Why do we drive on parkways and park on driveways?
Why isn't phonetic spelled the way it sounds?
Why are there interstate highways in Hawaii?
If you're in a vehicle going the speed of light, what happens when you turn on the headlights?
Have you ever imagined a world with no hypothetical situations?
Why do they put Braille dots on the keypad of the drive-up ATM?
Why is it that when you transport something by car, it's called a shipment, but when you transport something by ship, it's called cargo?
If you throw a cat out a car window does it become kitty liter?
How did a fool and his money get together?
Why did kamikaze pilots wear helmets?
If corn oil comes from corn, where does baby oil come from?
How do they get a deer to cross at that yellow road sign?
Why is there an expiration date on my sour cream container?
If it's tourist season, why can't we shoot them?
What's another word for thesaurus?
Why do they sterilize the needles for lethal injections?
What do they use to ship Styrofoam?
When you choke a smurf, what color does it turn?
Is it true that cannibals don't eat clowns because they taste funny?
Does fuzzy logic tickle?
What was the best thing before sliced bread?
Why do they call it a TV set when you only get one?
"Experience is what you get when you didn't get what you wanted."
What do you do when you see an endangered animal that eats only endangered plants?
If a book about failures doesn't sell, is it a success?
Can you be a closet claustrophobic?
Do hungry crows have ravenous appetites?
If a parsley farmer is sued, can they garnish his wages?
If a stealth bomber crashes in a forest, will it make a sound?
Do cemetery workers prefer the graveyard shift?
Why do they lock gas station bathrooms? Are they afraid someone will clean them?
If the cops arrest a mime, do they tell him he has the right to remain silent?
If you're cross-eyed and have dyslexia, can you read all right?
Why do people who know the least know it the loudest?
Is it possible to be totally partial?
Would a fly without wings be called a walk?
If the funeral procession is at night, do folks drive with their lights off?
If a turtle doesn't have a shell, is he homeless or naked?
When it rains, why don't sheep shrink?
Should vegetarians eat animal crackers?
How come we choose from just two people to run for president and 50 for Miss America
If carrots are so good for the eyes, how come I see so many dead rabbits on the highway
If flying is so safe, why do they call the airport the terminal?
Why is a person who plays the piano called a pianist but a person who drives a racecar is not called a racist?
Why do croutons come in airtight packages? Aren't they just stale bread to begin with?
If love is blind, why is lingerie so popular?
Why doesn't Tarzan have a beard?
If "Q" were castrated, would he become "O"?
If Superman could stop bullets with his chest, why did he always duck when someone threw a gun at him?
Isn't Disney World a people trap run by a mouse?
Whose cruel idea was it for the word "lisp" to have an "s" in it?
Where does the fire go when the fire goes out?
What's another word for synonym?
So what's the speed of dark?
Is reading in the bathroom considered Multi-Tasking?
If the universe is everything, and scientists say that the universe is expanding, what is it expanding into?
Why do they call it the Department of Interior when they are in charge of everything outdoors?
Why do you press harder on a remote-control when you know the battery is dead?
Why is it that in the US:
If you take off all your clothes and walk down the street waving a machete and firing an Uzi, terrified citizens will phone the police and report: "There's a naked person outside!"
Just wondering....
Why is "abbreviated" such a long word?
Why is lemon juice made with artificial flavor, and dishwashing liquid made with real lemons?
Why is the third hand on the watch called a second hand?
Why isn't there a special name for the tops of your feet?
If nothing ever sticks to TEFLON, how do they make TEFLON stick to the pan?
Can a stupid person be a smart-ass?
Can fat people go skinny-dipping?
Why is it considered necessary to nail down the lid of a coffin?
Why is it that rain drops but snow falls?
Why is the time of day with the slowest traffic called rush hour?
Why is the man who invests all your money, called a broker?
Why don't you ever see the headline "Psychic Wins Lottery"?
Why isn't there mouse flavored cat food? There is fish flavored!
Why is it that doctors call what they do "practice"?
Why is it that when you're driving and looking for an address, you turn down the volume on the radio?
Why does the sun lighten our hair, but darken our skin?
Why is it called lipstick if you can still move your lips?
Why doesn't glue stick to the inside of the bottle?
Why is it that to stop Windows, you have to click on "Start"?
If all is not lost, where is it?
If Barbie is so popular, why do you have to buy her friends?
Why do steam irons have a permanent press setting?
Why do you need a driver's license to buy liquor when you can't drink and drive?
Why are there flotation devices under plane seats instead of parachutes?
Do you need a silencer if you are going to shoot a mime?
If a cow laughed, would milk come out her nose?
If you tied buttered toast to the back of a cat and dropped it from a height, what would happen?
Why are cigarettes sold in gas stations when smoking is prohibited there?
You know how most packages say "Open here". What is the protocol if the package says, "Open somewhere else"?
You know that little indestructible black box that is used on planes, why can't they make the whole plane out of the same substance?
If a 7-11 is open 24 hours a day, 365 days a year, why are there locks on the doors?
Why do we drive on parkways and park on driveways?
Why isn't phonetic spelled the way it sounds?
Why are there interstate highways in Hawaii?
If you're in a vehicle going the speed of light, what happens when you turn on the headlights?
Have you ever imagined a world with no hypothetical situations?
Why do they put Braille dots on the keypad of the drive-up ATM?
Why is it that when you transport something by car, it's called a shipment, but when you transport something by ship, it's called cargo?
If you throw a cat out a car window does it become kitty liter?
How did a fool and his money get together?
Why did kamikaze pilots wear helmets?
If corn oil comes from corn, where does baby oil come from?
How do they get a deer to cross at that yellow road sign?
Why is there an expiration date on my sour cream container?
If it's tourist season, why can't we shoot them?
What's another word for thesaurus?
Why do they sterilize the needles for lethal injections?
What do they use to ship Styrofoam?
When you choke a smurf, what color does it turn?
Is it true that cannibals don't eat clowns because they taste funny?
Does fuzzy logic tickle?
What was the best thing before sliced bread?
Why do they call it a TV set when you only get one?
"Experience is what you get when you didn't get what you wanted."
What do you do when you see an endangered animal that eats only endangered plants?
If a book about failures doesn't sell, is it a success?
Can you be a closet claustrophobic?
Do hungry crows have ravenous appetites?
If a parsley farmer is sued, can they garnish his wages?
If a stealth bomber crashes in a forest, will it make a sound?
Do cemetery workers prefer the graveyard shift?
Why do they lock gas station bathrooms? Are they afraid someone will clean them?
If the cops arrest a mime, do they tell him he has the right to remain silent?
If you're cross-eyed and have dyslexia, can you read all right?
Why do people who know the least know it the loudest?
Is it possible to be totally partial?
Would a fly without wings be called a walk?
If the funeral procession is at night, do folks drive with their lights off?
If a turtle doesn't have a shell, is he homeless or naked?
When it rains, why don't sheep shrink?
Should vegetarians eat animal crackers?
How come we choose from just two people to run for president and 50 for Miss America
If carrots are so good for the eyes, how come I see so many dead rabbits on the highway
If flying is so safe, why do they call the airport the terminal?
Why is a person who plays the piano called a pianist but a person who drives a racecar is not called a racist?
Why do croutons come in airtight packages? Aren't they just stale bread to begin with?
If love is blind, why is lingerie so popular?
Why doesn't Tarzan have a beard?
If "Q" were castrated, would he become "O"?
If Superman could stop bullets with his chest, why did he always duck when someone threw a gun at him?
Isn't Disney World a people trap run by a mouse?
Whose cruel idea was it for the word "lisp" to have an "s" in it?
Where does the fire go when the fire goes out?
What's another word for synonym?
So what's the speed of dark?
Is reading in the bathroom considered Multi-Tasking?
If the universe is everything, and scientists say that the universe is expanding, what is it expanding into?
Why do they call it the Department of Interior when they are in charge of everything outdoors?
Why do you press harder on a remote-control when you know the battery is dead?
Why is it that in the US:
If you take off all your clothes and walk down the street waving a machete and firing an Uzi, terrified citizens will phone the police and report: "There's a naked person outside!"
Just wondering....
