Not as easy as you think in smaller specimens. And in maturer fish females can get long extensions aswell and their colors are almost the same as males. Generally speaking Males tend to get larger, have longer bodies and snouts, larger mouths, a more dominant disposition, and their fin extensions are consistently longer (but never rule out the possibility the the fins have been damaged and are growing back)... So fins and coloration are not reliable but, size, shape and attitude are and in sexually active specimens there's venting, with the female have the larger blunter tube.