BoyFriend Left for Marine 'bootcamp', how to comfort her?

[Pandamania]

How do you comfort some one when there loved one goes into the Marine's ? I've a Seventeen yr old daughter who's boyfriend and best friend left today. She's already in tears. By the way, just fyi, I'm a woman. Husband isn't being much help. Your experiences and/or opinions of how to help her would be greatly appreciated. TIA.

 

[Pandamania]

? bump?

 

[Pandamania]

HMmmmm.....no one else can think of any thing intelligent to say to her either? Husband told her...."you should be proud of him, not sad".....doesn't really do the trick. I told her to try to write a letter to him. Or call and talk to his mom and sisters. That didn't do it either, they are in the same emotional boat as her.

 

[Chaitika]

My opinion: Let her be. Make sure she knows you're there for her when she's ready to talk about it. Sometimes time is the only healer.

 

[Ajno]

My opinion: Let her be. Make sure she knows you're there for her when she's ready to talk about it. Sometimes time is the only healer.

This. I'd give her space. If shes asking you for advice, I'd have her start a journal or have her write him a letter everyday. Keeping busy helps the time move quicker. Good luck to her and her BF

 

[Andre87]

I was in the Marine Corps for 4 years its a very hard thing to go through but the best way to look at it he will have plenty of oppurtunitys to go home and see your daughter these first 6 months to a year are going to be really difficult for him and her because depending on what job he chose is how long things will be, just let her know before she knows it he will be back in a suit and trust me he will be thinking of her everyday lol but tell her to write letters and more letters send him pictures all that i loved getting mail and im sure she will love receiving it from him well hopefully this helps

 

[Mudslinger14]

Get her a replacement bf for the time being

No hah. Just let her be I guess. Keep her focused on school, maybe get a job etc. Find a hobby, like fish keeping, that she can work on while her boyfriend is away. Just an idea...
Good luck!

 

[beex215]

my suggestion would be you the woman, to be her boyfriend. problem solved

 

[Pandamania]

Thankyou all for your advise, (except for 'beex215', huh? weird.) We talked for quite a while last night. She is most worried that after his training and he is deployed, that he won't be coming back. I'm sure you get the jist of what I'm saying without me using graphic words. Her bf/bff is a jokester, big hearted, very outgoing, and a high IQ to boot. I told her stuff I figured she wanted to hear, and at the same time was very truthful and practical about things. She just turned 17 a week ago, so trying to get her to see 'the big picture' is hard at times. One reason he joined is for the benefits, for after his 'voluntary' time is up. $$$ so he can go to college, and also to quilify for a VA Loan to buy a home. It's impossable for most ppl in our area to be able to go to college for 4 to 8 years, without stacking up debt for the next 80 years. This is pretty much the only 'ticket to ride' these people have. Anyway, I told her I would take a weekly picture of her for him, and that she should write lots of letters. To share her good and bad times with him. Tell him about the goofy things that happen at school too. He's friends with all the Teachers he's had. I told her to remind them to write to him too.

 

[Pandamania]

Mudslinger14 = She's got 3 aquariums in her room right now. And she's an A/B grade student. She's a brainiak! Takes Physics/ Chemistry, Spanish, some advanced Trig Math stuff that I cannot fathum how to do! She was in Track after school but dropped out due to all of her homework.