Lol your having lots of issues I see xD, I kinda think I know what they are spoken about them with my tank builder but they where much thinner no massive circle base.
I would just smash some aquarium safe silicone onto one side of the bulk head when screwing it in the side with the big circle, only issue is if its leaking for another reason its going to be a pain to take off you'll have to cut the silicone with a thin stanley knife or so as for the bulk heads etc with tools we never really do that down here for proper bulk heads if anything maybe a half turn after hand tighten, if you turn to much with a wrench/spanner the pressure can cause the glass the crack.
you could also try running some silicone around the outside part and smoothing it down with a latex glove try push it into the hole and then thicken it up that should also work, it shouldn't leak though i have only installed 10 or so but none of them leaked, maybe try another twist but be carefully its not to strong.