Elvis Dead, Is Elvis Alive?...Onion Newsflash, August 17'th 1977

scottgeeze

Feeder Fish
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Mar 5, 2007
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Michigan, U.S.A.
MEMPHIS, Tenn.-Elvis Presley, "The King of Rock and Roll," was found dead in his Graceland mansion Tuesday, raising the question: is Elvis alive?
At 4:15 p.m. EST, a friend discovered Presley on the bathroom floor, surrounded by empty syringes. The cause of death, Shelby County coroners said,was a massive drug overdose.
Said Coroner Bertrand McAlister, "The fact that he wasn't breathing, that he was cold in appearance and that his heart was not beating, led me to wonder, 'Could he be alive?' "
Within an hour of the discovery of Presley's body, news of the beloved entertainer's death spread across the nation, prompting millions of fans to think Presley was still alive.
"They said Elvis died of a massive drug-induced coronary. They also said that huge amounts of Heroin, Demerol, Codeine and Alcohol were found in his system," Nashville resident Francine Rae said. "Something just doesn't add up."
Presley's body is scheduled to be buried at Graceland this week. as a result, fans have vowed to keep an eye out for Presley all over the country in the coming decades.
 
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