Rules of a Tank Boss


Redtail Catfish
Original poster
MFK Member
Dec 21, 2018
Washington DC
(As Inspired by my rotten Oscar Brick)

1. Do what you want, when you want.
2. Make other fish move aside.
3. Eat as much as you want. If another fish doesn't like it, take their food.
4. Bull your way into territories. What, they gonna stop you?
5. Beware of the co-boss or second.
6. Chase tank mates for exercise.
7. Root around in plants and deco, wrecking tank.
8. Make debris storms by fighting your reflection.
9. Ignore petty squabbles.
10. Flare at any defiance from tank mates.
11. Let your lieutenant do the dirty work of maintaining order.
12. Keep the peace. Or else!
13. Flare at fishkeeper when unhappy.
14. Throw rocks against glass for fun.
15. Knock over heavy objects for fun.
16. Tear pieces of plants off for fun.
17. Do random mayhem such as pulling heaters off glass and filtration pads from overflows. Knocking powerheads sideways works, too.
18. Squeeze into hides that are too small and get stuck. Then figure out how to get loose.
19. Intimidate tank mates by body shaking, leaning over or crowding.
20. Defend your buddy.
21. Demand primary attention from the fishkeeper.
22. Throw tantrums when you want certain foods.
23. Start fights randomly.
24. Break up fights randomly.
25. Nudge other fish aside when they won't get out of your way.
26. Be moody. Lay on your side, rip up plants and pile things up for whatever reason. Shove a boulder against the glass when angry.
27. If you have a big mouth, use it to scare other fish.
28. Expect fishkeeper to hand feed you.
29. Force other fish into one area of the tank when the mood hits.
30. When feeling playful, knock other fish out of the way doing loops.
31. Create your own 'space' taking up 1/3 of the tank. Buddies allowed. Everyone else not.
32. Out compete everyone for food. Greed is good. If they take too long to gulp it down, snatch it from their mouth.
33. When you want a petting session, chase the other fish away first.
34. Throw your weight around just because.


Bronze Tier VIP
MFK Member
Jun 19, 2006
Datnoid Island
Nice post.
Years ago I had a big beautiful Tanganyican tilapia....oreochromis,sarotherodon or whatever they call it these days which had established itself as the tank boss.It would chase the other fish away from the floating pellets then sulk and watch the others as they tried to get close enough to snatch a few.