A heater doesn't have to be "over sized" to have the potential to cook ones fish. Even smaller underrated heaters can cook ones fish if they stay stuck in the on position. It simply takes longer, compared to a more powerful heater. So instead of a disaster taking place over night, it takes place over a long weekend while one is away. It still happens all the time.
This is not true and unscientific. If a heater is stuck, the tank water temperature will eventually reach equilibrium according to a heat loss equation that is proportional to the room temperature and the heat delivering capacity of the heater. At a constant room temperature, a smaller heater will reach lower equilibrium temperature than a larger heater. At a higher room temperature, both heaters will attain respectively higher equilibrium temperature. Most heater manufacturers provide a chart to help select the right size heater, typically based on raising the equilibrium temperature of a given volume of water to a maximum of 10F above room temperature.
The only chance a right size heater can over heat (or under heat) the tank water is if the room temperature can fluctuate by a large margin. Say if you select the right size heater based on a room temperature of 70F, the maximum temperature a stuck heater can attain is 80F. But if there is a heat wave, the AC is off, the heater is stuck, and the room temperature hits 90F, then you are looking for cooked fish. When I go away for vacation, I don't turn off the heat or AC and set my thermostat at 65F in winter, and 78F in summer and all my heaters are either right size or undersized.