I need to vent and some advice!

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This isn't going to be easy, and i've already been fighting the emotional coaster with this guy. But, I know that this is right, and so I have to do what's best for him even though it hurts me.
 
Felix (the dog) was put down this morning. We took him in around 9. I did not stay, as I was already a wreck, and they don't let you be in the room anyways.

I took a 3 hour road trip to NJ, indulged in going broke from buying fish, and headed back home.

Sitting here with my 3 other dogs, and they know something isn't right.. it's just now hitting home that he's not coming back.

I look at his pillow, and I can see the indent where he would sleep, and I wish nothing but for him to be back in that pillow.
 
Update:

It's been really hard dealing with Felix not being around.. some days are harder than others.

Today is the Worst.

A friend of mine took her dog to the shelter to have her dog vaccinated, and there sat Felix. In a cage. Alive...

I am so mad right now, and I want nothing more than to go to that shelter tomorrow and cause havoc. I want them to feel how I feel. Betrayed, and deceived. Hurt that I've been mourning over MY dog, My pet, when he's sitting in a cage miserable.. When I did what needed to be done as an owner, and they lied to me.
 
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