Get a pocket clam, easy to carry around all day, doesant need lots of space and makes cute and vomit inducing gurgling noises Have you considered a tamagoshi
if you really want a personable animal get a farret. they are really cool. only thing is they need a lot of attention. try going on petfinder.com and seeing if anyone in your area wants to get rid of their unwanted chinchilla if you dont wanna pay a lot for one.
I think you should get a Boa. I have had a red tail for the last 17 yrs and she is very sweet... if you like snakes they love to be held. Just a thought
you could get bird they fit you criteria pretty well, there kinda noisy tho.
i think your really not gonna be happy unless you get a dog or cat(there food and litter box stinks bad) i had rodents, birds, lizards, newts, fish even the puffers which are likened to dogs alot. and none of them beat a dog. i would tell you dont get a animal and expect it to be like something else because it wont be.
A parrot would be a great option for you in my opinion they are the best pet and very interactive but they arent for everyone they require alot of work and time. And some good begginer species listed from easiest to more difficult would be budgies, cockatiels, conures from the pyrrhura genus, and quakers.