Book Recommendations

[snakeguy101]

hyperspace by Michio Kaku, it will blow your mind. I have used that book as a reference in papers from English to physics class. I have never learned so much from a book and it is very interesting to read too.

 

[meghanashley]

It's alot harder than you think. you won't be able to control it all the time. there's alot you may not be aware of. When you're talking to someone you tend to lose eye contact briefly every few seconds. The reason we don't stare can be precieved as eithor predatory (like stalking prey) or aggressive (like a challenge) intent which puts the person being glared at in a fight or flight attitude. here's the kicker though , everytime you look away from someone , the direction you look away from establishes your standing. looking to the side is mostly nuetral , looking down is submissive.
WHERE your eyes lock on someones face say plenty too. The mood of the conversation will change. The area between the eyes is a safe zone , it can mean something or nothing , the area between the eyebrows or temple can make someone feel tense.

Heirarchy on first meets Is established in the handshake. If someone extending their hand to shake yours has their palm facing downward , it's a powerplay , basically "I'm better than you". you don't fall for this trap by reversing it , closing both your hands on this person brings it back to "we're equals and I respect you" You can gain the upper hand again if you put the second hand behind their back. from there the greetings either end or you can lead them into the direction you're both walking.. to everyone watching this is a clear show of control , to those who don't know or do know they are being led , they have no choice but to submit at this point.

Also , remember that when you are talking "It's 10% what you said and 90% how you said it"

The more you think about making good eye contact, the worse it is to control though. I've always worked in a male dominated work place, so I know how to give a good hand shake, not to say that women don't shake well , but the hand shake dominance thing is usually more of a guy thing in my experience. I've only had a hand shake-off with another women maybe once or twice, and both times stare downs ensued quickly. I do start making preliminary assumptions of someone when I shake their hand, I hate when people do the half hand thing or just squeeze your fingers a tiny bit.

 

[meghanashley]

hyperspace by Michio Kaku, it will blow your mind. I have used that book as a reference in papers from English to physics class. I have never learned so much from a book and it is very interesting to read too.

physics eshhh, but the title sounds interesting, I'll have to gie it a try

 

[aquahunter]

I think you'll love the Phsych books. 48 Laws of power particularly helps in the work place.

 

[meghanashley]

I think you'll love the Phsych books. 48 Laws of power particularly helps in the work place.

Ever read "How to Negociate anything with anyone anywhere, around the world" Someone was tossing this book out and I grabbed it. Can't say I read it cover to cover but, but a few excerps that I have read were interesting.

 

[snakeguy101]

physics eshhh, but the title sounds interesting, I'll have to gie it a try

I forgot to mention that there is an awesome story about a koi pond in there very beginning of the book I think everyone here could really relate to it.

 

[meghanashley]

^ ok that might make up for the physics

 

[aquahunter]

Ever read "How to Negociate anything with anyone anywhere, around the world" Someone was tossing this book out and I grabbed it. Can't say I read it cover to cover but, but a few excerps that I have read were interesting.

I saw it on amazon a couple months ago but the reviews didn't motivate me to buy it... I'm ordering a book on psychological profiling (if it wasn't obvious already I'm big on understanding human behavior) I'll let you know how that read goes.

 

[meghanashley]

^ is human behavior a professional interest of yours or just something that intrigues you?

 

[aquahunter]

^ is human behavior a professional interest of yours or just something that intrigues you?

No it just intrigues me. Started as a kid I guess. I was real naive and wanted to know what makes people tick. I'd observe strangers in public , try and size them up, give them a story. I'd eavesdrop on conversations , listen for cues and try to predict the next response. Having the upperhand , knowing when you're being manipulated and how to counter-manipulate. I stopped holding grudges because as unique as we beleive ourselves to be, everyone's a product of their environment and a slave to circumstance. "Forgive them for they know not what they do"

I have a personal philosophy when defining society. I place two objects of smiliar size and shape on a table-- A Rock , and a Gold Nugget. you can pick one of these objects , but you can't go back on your choice. So what do you chose? I'll explain the rest of this philosophy once you give me your answer.