The single biggest regret in my life...

[ceeej31]

At the LFS I felt like an executioner.

i know that feeling, watching that poor little fish go out the door while knowing deep down that its chances of it living a long healthy life are slim. yet after working at my lfs for over a year now i still feel the good outweighs the bad, ive met so many people with interests similar to my own, ive learned more about fish than i ever thought possible, and ive gotten tons of hours of hands on experience. sure i still have that sinking feeling in my stomach about the baby oscar going out the door but i can still sleep at night because i know i did my best to educate the person who bought it, atleast i now know it has a fighting chance.
and as for pursuing my intrests in aquatic life as a career, i feel i would be letting myself down if i didnt, sure money will be tight, but i will look forward to getting up in the morning, every day will be interesting, i will be in my element.
thats my two cents

 

[Somethingfishyinc.net]

I must chime in since i'm 40 doing what I love at least most of the time. I have been in business over 18 years & started to work in the buiness 25 years ago in the pet industry. Its not always fun & easy! I do get burn out & go home to twenty tanks (some biggys) & the last thing I want to do is water changes! I clean everyone else's tanks & 500 tanks between now two stores. I also have a four year old at home. I would not trade it for the world. I do not make a ton of money but I pay the bills. I say I'm stuggling to be middle class. I have made good other business moves with realstate & own my own building.
I tell anyone who wants to attempt getting into the business they should have another half that brings home the benefits etc. because I have gone without them for a long time, no dental & when you have to use it then you could end up in debt which can drag you down. Either your poor & get free this & that or rich & can pay for it all but when your in the middle then your kinda screwed.
My other half just had her pay cut & benefits & now I'm struggling to pay the $450 medical & day care, & house payment plus my giant utilities bills.
So belive me sometimes I look at what some friends make working 40 hours a week with weekends off etc. & want that so i can enjoy being a hobbyist even though I will always have it in my blood.
I work every Christmans, Thanksgiving etc... I really do not have a day off, EVER! Plus when I want to go on vacation it cost me double or triple to do so because I have to pay others & more hours to cover when I'm gone! UGH.
I do rely on part time help, hobbyist because they love what they do for me & not relying on it for main source of income because I can not provide insurance & paid for vacations etc. I do give discounts, take everyone out for steak dinners, buy lunch weekly etc.. to show my appreciation for helping me out the best I can. I wish I was at times bigger so I can do more but like this second store I just open & have not had a sale in two days I ready to jump off a bridge! Bigger is not always not better & can lose the mom & pop feel.

anyways sorry so long, but got me rolling on the subject, but I can relate in a way?

take care
me

 

[Yanbbrox]

Kid on a skate board syndrome, I've always wanted to skate and when I turned 30 I purchased a skateboard. When your older and wiser the falls hurt so much more.

As a kid you fall off and go again, once in a while you break you leg, heal and go again.

As an adult you fall, break your leg and can't work for a while, bills mount up etc.

As a kid you've nothing to lose as an adult you risk losing everything on a new venture, fortune favors the brave you've got risk everything to be a kid again.

Sorry for being so poetic

 

[girl_interrupted]

Well, as I approach the age of 40, I am stuck. Wheels permanently planted skyward. Every day I sit in a cube, for 9 hours. Tapping keys and moving a mouse. I format business documents. Does it pay well? Kinda, sorta - I mean, I don't have to eat cat food, and I have a roof over my families head, and we have two cars - so no complaints there. And my job almost pays the bills.

But when I go to sleep (which I find difficult to do) I always think about how passionate I was about fish when I was 10 or 12, and still am, as it is my top of the list hobby.

My job is, like for most North Americans, relatively unfullfilling.

If I could go back, If I had a chance to do it all again - i would persue an education and career path that would have me managing a fish/livestock department, or something like that.

Would it pay the bills? Not sure. And there's the rub. Doing something I love, probably wouldn't "almost" pay the bills like my current job does.

Perhaps this isn't a post about regret. Perhaps this is a post about how North American living forces us into slots. Forces us into mind numbing existence so that we can provide for our families.

I wish I was that 12 year old boy again, or at least meet him and tell him to enjoy the time he spends fishing at the creek more, or collecting frogs or snakes or toads.

Then again, I do get that chance, to tell that boy, my son.. and I think i'll do it tonight - after I finish tapping these keys and moving this mouse.

Amen to that. And might I add, beautifully written. I believe in doing something you love over something you must. Heck I studied Creative Writing and people say its going to get me nowhere. But I dont care what low paying job related to writing I could get. I'll love it. So kudos to your new mentality. PS- its NEVER to late! I tell my mom that all the time... I wish when people get older they don't think theres no where else to go. Its never... too... late! Ever! Until I'm in the ground.

 

[chefjamesscott]

First I HATE THE INTERNET SOMETIMES

I spent a good amount of time typing a post for this then the net fragged my connection here argggggggggggggggghhhhh

 

[Plec123]

Well, as I approach the age of 40, I am stuck. Wheels permanently planted skyward. Every day I sit in a cube, for 9 hours. Tapping keys and moving a mouse. I format business documents. Does it pay well? Kinda, sorta - I mean, I don't have to eat cat food, and I have a roof over my families head, and we have two cars - so no complaints there. And my job almost pays the bills.

But when I go to sleep (which I find difficult to do) I always think about how passionate I was about fish when I was 10 or 12, and still am, as it is my top of the list hobby.

My job is, like for most North Americans, relatively unfullfilling.

If I could go back, If I had a chance to do it all again - i would persue an education and career path that would have me managing a fish/livestock department, or something like that.

Would it pay the bills? Not sure. And there's the rub. Doing something I love, probably wouldn't "almost" pay the bills like my current job does.

Perhaps this isn't a post about regret. Perhaps this is a post about how North American living forces us into slots. Forces us into mind numbing existence so that we can provide for our families.

I wish I was that 12 year old boy again, or at least meet him and tell him to enjoy the time he spends fishing at the creek more, or collecting frogs or snakes or toads.

Then again, I do get that chance, to tell that boy, my son.. and I think i'll do it tonight - after I finish tapping these keys and moving this mouse.

that was nice to read. and please, instill the love of animals and fishkeeping into your son, because if he learns from you he will really come to enjoy the hobby and have a love of animals.

 

[Redearsunfish]

My son told me tonight that he hates homework, and that he'd rather catch frogs with his old man at the lake. I told him that he needs to study, and perhaps he can be a vet and work with reptiles everyday one day.

And there it is in a nutshell.

 

[chefjamesscott]

Now new post!

Ok I am 42 with 7 kids and 1 on the way. First the reason why we have a baby every 2 years or so is this. That new baby smell wears off and we simply have to get another. In the words of Bob Marley "Everything gonna be alright!!"-to those who say we can't provide for them.

I must offer you a word of caution, please do not let your regrets bring about an attempt to relive your lost passions through your children.

Now to wax esoteric on you for a moment. I credit my mother for shaping me to be what I am today. For she taught me to pursue my dreams till they became my reality, in fact with this she told me my dreams were my reality and they must be lived with vim and vigor otherwise they would become the nightmares of things unrealized.

I feel that many many many adults have grown old inside and have forgotten that life is in the living of it. As well they have forgotten that life does not consist in the abundance of possessions.

There is a thing I teach about living to people. It is something I have observed about children. Watch a young child and see this, the amazement that comes over them with the simplest of matters. I call this the look of wild eyed wonder. The funny thing about children is for the most part they are not at the point of familiarity with life so as to have allowed said familiarity to breed contempt for the newness of the day.

I encourage you to take a close look at the life you are living and see what is need and what is greed! Take an inventory and toss out the things that are not essentials to existence. A good friend of mine had a saying from her mother that I loved-"It is not the high cost of living that kills, but, rather the cost of high living!"-terri shipley's mom

The thing I teach about how to live the fulfilled life basically goes like this.

Take a book and put it on the table in front of you. Better yet get yourself a journal book that is empty inside. Write on the front cover tomorrow=95%. Flip it over and write yesterday=100%. Open it and write on the very first page Today=5%.

Here is a future useage for this book with this one thing in mind.

The pages of this book are empty, empty except for what you write on them. So take this book of tomorrow, today and yesterday. Write in the pages the date at the top, then every time you can think of it when a fear or hypothetical reality hits your thoughts put it to paper. At the end of the day take a red and black highlighter. The things that came to pass use red, the things that did not black out!!!!

Do this for one month. At the end of the month do a calculation and you will be at the amount of stuff that was worried about that never happened. For 95% of the fears of the future that assail you dissipate in the light of the day where 5% comes to pass and they then cloud over the past and cause all kinds of regrets. Imagine the success of living a life where 100% of your time is allocated to deal with 5% of what does happen!!!!

Try this. Get and give forgiveness from the things of the past regrets of things undone, regrets of things done wrong to you and by you. Make things right where you can and bury the rest.

Then start the day with a determined ignorance of what might happen, a purposed effort to deal with what is happening and and freedom from the monsters and skeletons of days gone past. This is true life LIVING THE DAY AS IT COMES.

At the age of 40 it is not to late to begin the begin. Take this new restaurant I started at the university of regina just 2.5 years ago. I had a dream to one day get a spot in the university, something that seemed like an impossibility. Yet here is it 7 years after I first tried a reality.

Now I have a passion for pets which I am going to turn into a business. There are those who think me nuts for starting a pet store at the age of 42-43 when I already have a catering company, and a restaurant. But am I nuts for following the dreams that drive me, am I ????

If there are dreams that are not really things that are obtainable put them to rest so that they do not trouble the waters. BUT IF YOU HAVE A DREAM THAT PERSISTS PURSUE IT WITH ALL YOU HAVE!!!!!!!!!!!!!

This world needs more dreamers who are willing to stand up and go for it.

I lost 1/4 of a million dollars with my first restaurant, a serious kick in the teeth for sure. But failure is not a bad thing. Failure can be the best of teachers. Here is it 12 years after that failure and the dream has become a reality, not without it's costs in the way of creature comforts of life. But, I like to say dreams and visions do not take shape for or of themselves. And if there is no chance of failure you are not taking enough risks.

I would encourage you in two things. First make sure you dont just exist but that you LIVE!!!!!! Secondly, with your kids find out what they want, what their passion is for life and do everything in your power to assist them in accomplishing this and make sure you are not cheap with the three most important words I LOVE YOU!!!!!!

 

[fishy12]

Im pushing for my dream right now im 15 and i want to be a professional bullrider. Its hard on the pocket due to paying and traveling. But its what i love. And no injury will stop me from getting it. And when im on top i can get all the fish i love.

 

[sirdavidofdiscus]

I'm 42. At 35 I did a radical career change. I was a chemical batcher for 12yrs. Then 7yrs ago a job offer came to be a merchant sailor. I had 12hrs to accept it. Had two toddlers and wife at home. But I took it. It was probably the toughest choice I've ever made. Knowing I'd miss alot of my kids childhood. ( Gone 28 days home 14.) Do I have regrets ? of course. But the pay is far better and the health insurance is incredible. But now I have a 2 week vacation every month. And I do enjoy working outside even in the nasty weather. The other thing is I had to give up most my tanks because I'm not there to do any of the upkeep.
What did I really want to do? Be a vet. Went to school for biology in my 20's. Wasn't grown up enough to be serious about it. So dropped out and started manual labor in factories. Now I think I'd like to work in the R&D department of one of the pet food or water conditioning manufactoring companies. Will it happen unlikely, but when my youngest was born I never thought I'd take a job leaving town for a month at a time either.