The single biggest regret in my life...

  • We are currently upgrading MFK. thanks! -neo
Some of my favorites that I live by.





“We must become the change we want to see.” ~ Gandhi


"All compromise is based on give and take, but there can be no give and take on fundamentals. Any compromise on mere fundamentals is a surrender. For it is all give and no take." ~ Gandhi
 
Ya.. i know it sucks to work 8 hours a week, 9 to 5pm.. and work and come home and always looking forward to the weekend..

Sadly.. thats the kinda of thing society has labeled a RESPONSIBLE person....

But i know cases where people decided to change their perspective. They quit their job to peruse volunteer work, or public services or even ... writing...

Its not too late for you.. trust me.. My dad did that at age 45, he changed his career from working in an excutive office with CEOs.. to working for a church full time...

He enjoys life more now.. more than he did 15 years ago..

but my point is.. its important to kow what u have to do to be responsible.. if u have a family.. you own the responsibility of giving them a safe and security environment so they dont have to feel "unsafe" and abandon..

I think you can be a partime writer to get started on your work.. and slowly go into full time writing where it is profitable that u can make money off it...

Look at the book "Where the wild things are", it became a awarded children novel.. and the story is about dreaming big and having fun....I'm sure the Author Maurice Sendak has made millions now with that book..

If your serous about it.. and want to change perspective.. i'd say go for it..

 
gomezladdams;3578563; said:
a little "navel gazing" is natural at that age,40 is a tough milestone.I had quite a bit of internal turmoil then as well.liz said it best,looking back and regrets are only messing up the enjoyment of what you got.Play with the kids,rearrange the tanks,chat about nonsense with the wife.Im sure there are alot of good things in your life,turn your attention to them.

sorry I have to totally disagree with the red part :screwy:


vladfloroff;3579200; said:
I could not disagree more with this statement. The only one forcing you into a slot is you, plain and simple. If you are in dead end job with 4 kids and can't make ends meet you put yourself there, and you can get yourself out unless you're wearing a toe tag. If a single mom with 2 kids can go back to school and earn a degree no one has any excuses. I've seen it done more than once.

have to agree with the sentiment about being in a slot we human beings have the intrinsic ability to break from conformity

Geoey;3579263; said:
a friend of mine died of brain cancer at the age of 41.
we should enjoy every moment of our lives as much as we can .
even if you are stuck in an office,truck, kitchen what ever.

totally totally totally the truth

A story for you, A man was looking through his wifes clothes to decide on something special for her to wear when he came upon the drawer with the very special lace and chantilly lingere that they had been saving for that very special occasion. As he remembered all the good times he could not see a better time for his wife to wear them for the first time than the occasion that was coming the following weekend. So he took the fine silk garments from the drawer and decided that this would be the weekend that finally they were worn.

The only problem was this!!

He was deciding on what she was to wear when they put her in the ground. For his wife had suddenly passed away with no warning.

From this point in time the man decided that he would wear his best suits, eat from the fine china and stop waiting for the special days to enjoy life because today was special.
 
I feel your pain with the crappy day job. I Hate my job. I feel bad saying that because I feel like I should be grateful for what I have (especially now). I'm well aware that a crappy job is better than no job. My boss is the best I've ever had, decent pay (potential to make great pay), good insurance, 3 weeks vacation a year. But no matter how much I remind myself of all the good things I still get so depressed as soon as I step foot in the office. I'm getting to the point where I dread just going to sleep because that means I'm that much closer to going into work. I hate what I do that much!

I did go back to school to get away from the cubes when my husband joined the army. I got my associates in Biology. I had initially planned on going to be a Vet. Then my husband was injured and we moved home and I defaulted on my school loans. Now I'm waiting for my credit to clear up so I can go back and at least get my BA. Now I just want to do anything with animals. It's not the original plan but one I'm sure will make me more happy than where I am now. I think some of the most rewarding life paths are stumbled upon by accident.

If you are really unhappy with what you are doing try to change it! 40 hours a week is a lot of precious time to waste being miserable. It will be hard and it might not turn out how you thought it would but it's better than giving up.
 
What a great read; its interesting to see the diversity of advice everyone has given. I must say this is something that has been on my mind as of late, and I can relate with you redearsunfish. Readind about catching frogs and snakes brought back some good memories :). I'm 27, and work as a tv editor in the tv industry and hate the 10-6. I wake up everyday wishing I was going to a job doing something fish related. But I will tell you this: I'm happy to have a job in this tough time that can support me, my house, my fish hobby etc. Even though I'd love have a fish related job, it always boils down to one thing as you said: money.
If you have it, then I say go for it and open a business (and make sure I get a discount :D) But if you don't, and you have a wife and child, they are what comes first.
I've always thought "what if I had that job, and one day I didnt feel the same about it anymore"...
what if...
I think it comes down to distributing your time evenly, this way your balanced...
 
OK I'm seriously just gonna throw this out there and I'm going to say this up front that I'm not trying to be a jerk. These kind of thoughts and things sound like a mid life crises and I've known a few people who went through these and they went nuts. It starts off with simple things like wandering off to happier times in your life and ends in terrible things like taking a huge risk and switching jobs ultimately losing your house and destroying the security you have. I would look into that.

Also just be happy with what you have now. Lets do a checklist:

Do you have cancer?
Do you have aids?
Do you not have access to clean water?
Is an immediate family member dying in some horrible way?
Are you cold at night with no protection?
Are you personally in a war where a firefight could break out any second and kill you?
Is you biggest inconvenience how am I going to eat today?

If you answered no to all of these questions then your fine. I mean seriously if your biggest regret is "I wish I chose a job with fish" then your life is way better than a hell of a lot of people. Whenever someone I know starts thinking this way I tell them to man up, ask them the following questions then tell them they don't have it so bad. Because I very rarely find anyone that says yes to any of those questions.

Just giving you a little tough love bro, please don't take it the wrong way.
 
It seems to me that the OP has just about everything that most adult people dream about.
good job
kids
good marriage

I mean with what is going on in the world today I find it very hard to beleive.

We have a war going on right now and hundreds of thousands of soldiers are dieing and risking there lives everyday so that you can feel sorry for your self.

Then you have 10-15% of americans that are unemployed right now. And don't even know where there next dollar is going to come from afterwards.

Then you have hundreds of thousands of married couples that can't even have kids. And live there lives everyday thinking of just that. And how many do you have?

America was built on the legs of manufacturing workers, working 10-12 hours a day from 3,4,5am to 3,4,5pm. And working in 100 plus degree temps at times 6-7 days a weeks.

And you set there in a heated and air conditioned office and whine about setting in a chair for 8 hours and playing on the computer.
 
I think that what you do, or want to do is limited by you yourself. Who doesn't want to travel, volunteer, and otherwise lead an exciting international lifestyle? The thing is that who can be as ambitious, goal focused, and stress free to be able to handle that? I think besides things that tie you down like mortgages and having a family it will still not be easy for everyone to go out and live their dreams.

In our north american world having money = the freedom to do what you choose and gives more options. Its not a simple life, but we are materialistic and obsessed with technology.


I was also thinking about this today...life is not fair. And us here on this forum are fortunate. Life is cruel to many...life was given and taken harshly. The holocaust, darfur...being a chicken in a factory farm....we should live life to the max and try to be happy.

Do what you love, even if you hate your job because after work and the days off are made possible by having a job the rest of the time. Work is work...dream jobs likely will satisfy you in the passion aspect, but everyone has a life outside of work no matter what.
 
brianhellno;3581942; said:
OK I'm seriously just gonna throw this out there and I'm going to say this up front that I'm not trying to be a jerk. These kind of thoughts and things sound like a mid life crises and I've known a few people who went through these and they went nuts. It starts off with simple things like wandering off to happier times in your life and ends in terrible things like taking a huge risk and switching jobs ultimately losing your house and destroying the security you have. I would look into that.

Also just be happy with what you have now. Lets do a checklist:

Do you have cancer?
Do you have aids?
Do you not have access to clean water?
Is an immediate family member dying in some horrible way?
Are you cold at night with no protection?
Are you personally in a war where a firefight could break out any second and kill you?
Is you biggest inconvenience how am I going to eat today?

If you answered no to all of these questions then your fine. I mean seriously if your biggest regret is "I wish I chose a job with fish" then your life is way better than a hell of a lot of people. Whenever someone I know starts thinking this way I tell them to man up, ask them the following questions then tell them they don't have it so bad. Because I very rarely find anyone that says yes to any of those questions.

Just giving you a little tough love bro, please don't take it the wrong way.

:headbang2great post

hybridtheoryd16;3582176; said:
I think this thread is some what laughable.

It seems to me that the OP has just about everything that most adult people dream about.
good job
kids
good marriage

I mean with what is going on in the world today I find it very hard to beleive.

We have a war going on right now and hundreds of thousands of soldiers are dieing and risking there lives everyday so that you can feel sorry for your self. :irked:

Then you have 10-15% of americans that are unemployed right now. And don't even know where there next dollar is going to come from afterwards.:irked:

Then you have hundreds of thousands of married couples that can't even have kids. And live there lives everyday thinking of just that.:irked: And how many do you have?

America was built on the legs of manufacturing workers, working 10-12 hours a day from 3,4,5am to 3,4,5pm. And working in 100 plus degree temps at times 6-7 days a weeks.

And you set there in a heated and air conditioned office and whine about setting in a chair for 8 hours and playing on the computer.


Get real

:headbang2great post as well

krzr3000;3583129; said:
I think that what you do, or want to do is limited by you yourself. Who doesn't want to travel, volunteer, and otherwise lead an exciting international lifestyle? The thing is that who can be as ambitious, goal focused, and stress free to be able to handle that? I think besides things that tie you down like mortgages and having a family it will still not be easy for everyone to go out and live their dreams.

In our north american world having money = the freedom to do what you choose and gives more options. Its not a simple life, but we are materialistic and obsessed with technology.


I was also thinking about this today...life is not fair. And us here on this forum are fortunate. Life is cruel to many...life was given and taken harshly. The holocaust, darfur...being a chicken in a factory farm....we should live life to the max and try to be happy.

Do what you love, even if you hate your job because after work and the days off are made possible by having a job the rest of the time. Work is work...dream jobs likely will satisfy you in the passion aspect, but everyone has a life outside of work no matter what.

:headbang2great post


I KNEW THAT PEOPLE WOULD BE SENDING REALITY CHEQUES TO THE OP

hope yall can take them for the wisdom filled advice they are

have a great day everyone
 
MonsterFishKeepers.com