Not a matter of judging. I stand by my observation that minority groups can be the most racist. As for commonality, they would speak to me in their native tongue if they thought I was from the same culture. The "where are you from?" question is really irritating. While I only get it from foreign born people now, I can relate to this gal.Many good points. In my experience, when FOB person asks me, I dont think they are judging necessarily. I dont mean to deny you of your own experiences.
Sometimes that group of people feel "lost" away from their native land and perhaps looking for a commonality.