help me clear my head please

[frnchjeep]

I'm thinking about sticking around free of charge for a bit and just stomping around the house acting like an all around prick but inside I also know that's not the best decision.

Was cheating on you the best decision? I agree with Aqua. She wants you to be on her level to make herself feel less guilty. So, go ahead. Let her feel as miserable as you do. She will probably leave on her own if you are enough of a prick (don't break her stuff or anything, just be as unfriendly as possible). It may sound childish, but who cares? Do you think she should get away consequence free?

 

[phillydog1958]

please don't take me for a harsh, inconsiderate guy but buddy, you gotta "MAN UP" and get yourself together and stop feeling sorry for yourself. it's ok to feel bad about it but at some point you have got to clear your head and think straight. suck it up and act like a man. you have no friends, except your fish. you work 2 jobs and your girl is cheating on you. no one deserves to be cheated on, so i feel your pain, but you have got to get it together and start thinking clearly. life goes on . . . also, at some point, you and her need to sit down and talk. maybe the relationship can be saved and maybe not. at least talk about it. find out why she cheated.

 

[Freshwater Tim]

WHY sit down with her? She cheated!!! What is left to say? Why she cheated???? Does it matter at this point?? It is done....will it change the fact she was with someone else???

Maybe it is just me, but I would not/could not ever even think about "working it out".....may still love her but I couldn't ever trust her again.....and with out trust, you got nothing!

Personally, I would ride her ass until she left the house. You can talk later when emotions are not so high...like in a few months!

Regardless of what any of us say...you are going to do what you think is right.

I wish you the best of luck....it is a tough road .

 

[phillydog1958]

WHY she cheated?????? Does it matter at this point?? It is done....she was with someone else....Maybe it is just me, but I would not/could not ever even think about "working it out".....may still love her but I couldn't evr trusther again.....Personally, I would ride her ass until she left the house. You can talk later when emotions are not so high...like in a few months!

Regardless of what any of us say...you are going to do what you think is right.

I wish you the best of luck....it is a tough road .

TIM: we're only hearing one side of the story. i'm not saying that she can justify her infidelity, but we do not know what else is happening in this relationship. the man works all day. he does not have any friends, either. even if him and his girl decide to part ways, he's got to make some changes in his lifestyle. he needs a social life.

 

[Freshwater Tim]

TIM: we're only hearing one side of the story. i'm not saying that she can justify her infidelity, but we do not know what else is happening in this relationship. the man works all day. he does not have any friends, either. even if him and his girl decide to part ways, he's got to make some changes in his lifestyle. he needs a social life.

I agree 100%

Like I said before...there are 2 sides to every story...and somewhere in the middle you will find the truth.

 

[packer43064]

I've had two relationships last mere days before the year and a half part, I think I'm cursed now. Just recently the second relationship was broken, she did it. She said blah blah, but to cheat that's harsh dude. Best thing is just to leave, it's not like she doesn't want this because etc. and etc. She chose to cheat, she doesn't deserve any respect from you. Talk to her tonight and if she doesn't tell you what happened then it's over then and there. She needs to leave and never come back.

 

[rmorse]

If you love her....TALK TO HER. FIND OUT WHAT HAPPENED AND WHY.

I don't get all this "F her, she's done" talk. People make mistakes. People fail. People are HUMAN.


If my gf/wife cheated on me, I would be heartbroken. I also would find out why, and work to fix the problem. If she cheats on me again, I will start thinking about leaving.


I, for one, take the vow "for better or for worse" very seriously. There is a reason it isn't "for better or until it gets uncomfortable".

If you love her, find out what happened.

 

[Freshwater Tim]

If you love her....TALK TO HER. FIND OUT WHAT HAPPENED AND WHY.

I don't get all this "F her, she's done" talk. People make mistakes. People fail. People are HUMAN.


If my gf/wife cheated on me, I would be heartbroken. I also would find out why, and work to fix the problem. If she cheats on me again, I will start thinking about leaving.


I, for one, take the vow "for better or for worse" very seriously. There is a reason it isn't "for better or until it gets uncomfortable".

If you love her, find out what happened.

I don't think anyone gets married thinking they are going to not stay married! I just don't see how "finding out what happened" will help things.

It was pretty apparent "what happened".....I think that having an affair....CHEATING...is NOT a mistake. It a VERY concious decision. When she made that choice, she knew that it could be the end of her marraige...unless she was sooo drunk that she didn't know what she was doing...but that is pretty weak also.
Knowing she did it once.(for how long...who really knows, because she won't tell you the truth), would make it so every time that she left the house, you would be wondering....and then if she DID do it again and get caught.....then you would feel 10x as bad and pi$$ed off as the first.

But..again, this is only my personal opinion...and on this subject, I dig my heels pretty deep!

If she cheats on you, or you cheat on her..you were never meant to be together.

 

[rmorse]

I don't think anyone gets married thinking they are going to not stay married! I just don't see how "finding out what happened" will help things.

It was pretty apparent "what happened".....I think that having an affair....CHEATING...is NOT a mistake. It a VERY concious decision. When she made that choice, she knew that it could be the end of her marraige...unless she was sooo drunk that she didn't know what she was doing...but that is pretty weak also.
Knowing she did it once.(for how long...who really knows, because she won't tell you the truth), would make it so every time that she left the house, you would be wondering....and then if she DID do it again and get caught.....then you would feel 10x as bad and pi$$ed off as the first.

But..again, this is only my personal opinion...and on this subject, I dig my heels pretty deep!

If she cheats on you, or you cheat on her..you were never meant to be together.

I have made mistakes, even though it is a conscious decision. That does not make a difference.

I just don't understand how someone can say they love another person with all their heart, and not give them another chance.


If she cheats on you, or you cheat on her..you were never meant to be together.

That is a very bold statement.

 

[Freshwater Tim]

I have made mistakes, even though it is a conscious decision. That does not make a difference.

I just don't understand how someone can say they love another person with all their heart, and not give them another chance.


If she cheats on you, or you cheat on her..you were never meant to be together.

That is a very bold statement.

Your right...it is a bold satement.

I could not cheat on my GF of 5 years.....If I did, I don't beleive that we would stay together after that point.

When it comes to sharing a bed with someone, while committed to another...no second chance. Avoid the problem...if you feel you are going to stray...talk about it BEFORE you do it.....then it can probably be fixed...after the deed is done....it's done!