Some of the Best One-Liners

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go ahead punk, make my day.

badges, badges, we don't need no stinkin' badges.

get into the choppa!!

live for nothing, or die for something.

I'm sorry dave, I can't let you do that.

Happy birth day to you, happy birthday to you, happy birthday dear Jesus, happy birthday to you (full metal jacket).

Run Forrest Run.

Now what are we going to do??!!?? (After Forrest stopped running).

(couldn't resist).
man who can' poop, shouldn't blame toilet.

either do your biz or get off the pot!
 
My grandfather once said "Back in my day we didn't have fancy birth control methods like pullin' it out."
 
Last night I lay in bed looking up at the stars in the sky and I thought to myself, where the heck is the ceiling.

A countryman between two lawyers is like a fish between two cats.
Benjamin Franklin

A prisoner of war is a man who tries to kill you and fails, and then asks you not to kill him.
Winston Churchill






 
It's lonely at the top, but you eat better.

Don't drink and drive...You might hit a bump and spill it.

Friends help you move. Real friends help you move bodies.

Consciousness: That annoying time between naps.

Ever stop to think, and forget to start again?

Be nice to your kids...They will pick out your nursing home.

Always remember you're unique...Just like everyone else.
 
A lion won't cheat on his wife but Tiger Wood.
 
Free mahi mahi, free mahi mahi, if you will
 
(Zipper Down) "Your letting all the Flies out"
(Brick while playing BasketBall) "You do know there's a Basket, Right?"
"Its right there on the Left.... No, your other Left"
(Co-Worker says they are going on Break) "Break... They gave you a Break when they hired you!"
"tu madre guey"
"Tiene La Cara de Mil Putazos" (English.... He/She has a Face of a Thousand Punches)
 
The business of America is business.

War is hell.

Never has so much owed to so few.

I am become death, destroyer of worlds.

You can have any color you want so long as it's black.

success is 1% inspiration, 99% perspiration.

with malice towards none, and good will towards all.

one death is a tragedy, a million deaths is statistics.

to infinity and beyond.

I owe, I owe, off to work i go.
 
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