I'm sorry you guys have such a hard time with moving your cats, all of mine have become used to it and don't stress at all, mind you they had all shown signs of stress when I first moved them but they have all learned that it's no big deal now. It is a learned behavior just like hand feeding and petting your cats...
I think that the one thing that we can all agree on is for tank size... as big as you can afford to give them (financially as well as how much space you can afford to lose to your tank). I wouldn't have a problem with someone giving a RTC a 10 x 4 tank as a home... I mean lets face it here, if someone gives their RTC a tank that size and keeps the fish long enough to outgrow it... it is a very safe bet that they will upgrade anyway since thats what we (MFKers) do!... everyone here has done the grow out thing... including those that are saying to just go as big as you can straight away.
In an ideal situation we would all have the 50K tank built onto the side of our houses... fill it with all the fish that we could ever want and be done with it... but the simple fact of the matter is that there are very few people that not only can afford to do that within the hobby but also a lot of people whom do not have that much space available next to their homes for such a thing

LOL