Bullying and Repercussions

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Where do you fit in all of this?

  • Bully, that thought it was all fun and games

    Votes: 4 15.4%

  • Bully, that did feel bad, but did it anyways

    Votes: 8 30.8%

  • Victim, thought about hurting Bully(s) back

    Votes: 8 30.8%

  • Victim, have actual hurt a Bully(s)

    Votes: 15 57.7%

  • 2nd Generation, know of yours or other children bullying or being bullied

    Votes: 4 15.4%
  • Total voters
    26
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Well, I'm a great-grandma now (altho too young for it)
I don't think that retaliation directly on "the" bullies is the same thing as snapping & going after everybody. Directly on bullies, amounts to self defense, and (everyone may not agree) but it's to the point that 'doing what it takes' to stop them should not be punished.
One reason people *snap is bcuz of seeing others turn their backs on them. Not intervening to help someone is just as bad as doing it ourselves...except observers are often also afraid of the bullies.
Kids should always have someone to go to for help.
The point is, "Campaigns" aren't necessary when responsibilities are shared for what goes on.
Mean acts should be nipped in the bud.
It would help to reward kindness in school nowadays too, starting early, rather than only giving attention to bad actions.

I've intervened for people, kids, grandkids... if small steps don't work, I ratcheted it up for a solution more than once.
I've never regretted helping someone, no matter what I said or did to get it done. There's nothing worse than just once failing to act, bcuz you will never forget that cowardly feeling and that you should've tried.
 
petspoiler said:
Well, I'm a great-grandma now (altho too young for it)
I don't think that retaliation directly on "the" bullies is the same thing as snapping & going after everybody. Directly on bullies, amounts to self defense, and (everyone may not agree) but it's to the point that 'doing what it takes' to stop them should not be punished.
One reason people *snap is bcuz of seeing others turn their backs on them. Not intervening to help someone is just as bad as doing it ourselves...except observers are often also afraid of the bullies.
Kids should always have someone to go to for help.
The point is, "Campaigns" aren't necessary when responsibilities are shared for what goes on.
Mean acts should be nipped in the bud.
It would help to reward kindness in school nowadays too, starting early, rather than only giving attention to bad actions.

I've intervened for people, kids, grandkids... if small steps don't work, I ratcheted it up for a solution more than once.
I've never regretted helping someone, no matter what I said or did to get it done. There's nothing worse than just once failing to act, bcuz you will never forget that cowardly feeling and that you should've tried.
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Good Post! Couldn't agree more
 
Very good post petspoiler, I agree and remember it when I was in school the teachers for the most part did not care or listen to kids in need of some help. I'm not saying all teachers are bad, this was just my experience. I asked for help once cause I was getting very depressed. My counselor in school just told me they didn't really have any programs to help, that's all she said. So yes, listen and care, it really helps



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golcondorus said:
Interesting responses here. I don't know how old any of you are. I'm ten years out of high school, which I hated. I think high school is just about as close to hell as you can get. I admit I used to think about taking a gun and killing everyone I could. Used to plan suicide as well. Some people just can't handle the brutality that it is. The stress really is just unbearable for some, and we have no place for those people in our society today. They are forgotten, abandoned and pushed to the side. So, sometimes they retaliate.


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Click to expand...

I know exactly how you feel, the years from 6th grade till graduation were the worst of my life. I never though about hurting myself though, only others, but I did turn to drugs and alcohol to help deal with everything. Getting high was my only escape sometimes. Was it the right thing to do, absolutely not. Did it help keep something worse from happening, definitely.
 
Well just becoming a freshmen in high school bullying isn't that big as some people say it is but stills exist, personally I've never been bullied nor have bullied anyone, well at least not intentionally or from my own knowing. I don't like it either. But there's 2 types of people I've realized that are bullied. The ones that look different and the ones that have "werid" attitudes. I'll be honest here though sometimes I try to become friends with the people with different attitudes but they get all defensive thinking they are getting bullied which is pretty sad I think, that someone has been abused to that point. I usually just let them do their own thing.
Recently I stood up to someone being bullied started in our gym right outside the basketball locker room (this came to my advantage thank god.) and this kid I always see just a quiet dude I think he has aDD though as he's in some of my classes and just isn't the all there but still a nice guy non the less well anyway he always passes by my basketball locker to get to the equipment room to pickup paperwork and there is this douche always giving people crap and this kid stares at him in my head I'm thinking kid look away look away and he doesn't so I just stood and watch and this douche is pretty damn strong and throws this kid like a rag doll on the floor pinning him down with his foot instinctively I run at the guy and push him and at this point were exchanging words chest to chest I'm telling him to take his best shot me and my smart ass self know I can't take this dude down he's 6'4" I'm 6'2" and skinny this guy is a football player and being 6'2" and being a basketball player or any sport pretty much I'm considered a small guy. Well thank god my friend just comes out of the basketball locker room he's 6'8" just for reference and comes walking up to me and says is there a problem here Adam? And the douche just walked away. After that the kid just walked away confused I saw it in his eyes. Well the next day I learned what I really had done. This kid always says hi to me when he has no friends and doesnt really talk to anyone. Not just once when ever we past by we have a small talk about basketball and school the point is this kid talks to me when he talks to no one else. It makes me feel even cooler and better compared to when the coolest guy at school talks me or when my crush of the week says hi to me and gives me a hug (maybe not better then the hug part). It just makes me feel cooler when this guy says hi to me when doesn't to anyone else I dont know if this makes sense to anyone. But I remember from when I was 3 spiderman was told "with great power, comes great responsibility" surprisingly to this day it's so true.


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To a kid, caring means showing that you will take action, and stay with it until something improves.
Hope is everything.
Adults need to understand: for kids, TODAY is the only life they have.
 
I've been 1, 2, and 3. I never picked on someone for fun though, the kid I used to get into it with was a douche, he'd drop racial slurs and randomly insult me and my friends. I still felt bad when it was all over though.


Being bullied definitely changes you though. I have social anxiety and I dont really trust people. If I am in the halls at school, and they are mostly empty, save for a group of kids, I get very nervous walking past them. Mind you, I was almost never physically bullied, so it's not that. Just the idea of someone slinging an insult or something. And once I started making friends at work... like real trusting friendships, I literally cant fathom the concept of meaning anything to anyone. It's weird. I havent been "bullied" since 8th grade... high school junior now... and I'm just starting to notice some of these tendancies I have developed.
 
The problem is bullying today has changed so much from the 80's and 90's... Cyber bullying and mental bullying seems to be more the norm than physical bullying...

I remember two years ago i went to visit family in Australia and my younger cousin's g/f was cyber bullied and it go so serious it was taken to court due to comments and remarks made...

So just shows that where as before it was more either fight back or take the crap literally... Now a days its more about messing with peoples head which can be worst than physical bullying... Cuts heal, but mental scars can be hard to over come...


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